Each of us needs to admit that the things we really hate or strongly dislike seem to come back at us again and again, even though we believe we aren’t doing anything ourselves that would bring this foul wind upon us; yet it continues to come. The reason why this is happening should be rather clear and obvious, which is that we haven’t resolved that which we hate and dislike by changing our attitude or our outlook, or by making amends where we need to make amends. In other words, we continue to have to deal with dishonest people who cheat and lie to us, because we are in our way still dishonest, or we haven’t made good on our previous dishonesty, which is why we need to first examine ourselves, before we lash out at others, and their faults, as being the crux of the problem, when in actuality, our house is not actually in order, either.
The reason why we have challenges that confront us, of which, some of these challenges seem to be a repeat that we have seen time and time again, has an awful lot to do with the fact that we have failed to correctly analyze what needs to be analyzed correctly and hence we have to keep facing the same sorts of troubles again and again, because we haven’t resolved it. This signifies that whenever we have an aversion to somebody or something, we need to actually think about what it is that upsets us so much, or disturbs our equilibrium, and whether our reaction to such does anything to amend the issue, and whether there is a way to deal constructively with such.
We find that it is a truism that frequently those who come from abusive relationships, somehow, when they get into their next relationship, find it ultimately to be abusive as well. The reason why this is a fairly common occurrence is not that we are necessarily bad people or stupid, but rather has everything to do with us not taking the time to look into what the circumstances are that seem to create this undesired scenario, and to the degree that we can read the troubling signs in the future, this will help us to avoid such trouble. It is also conceivable that there is something in our own behavior which exacerbates certain situations, and thus makes it more likely that the other person will behave badly towards us.
Indeed, life is a two-way street, so that to complain that “woe is me” is not going to do much of anything to deal with the issues that should be addressed with something much more constructive, which is that before we lash out at the other as being the reason why our life is so miserable, we ought to consider that it may be our own mindset that needs to be adjusted, so that we are less judgmental, and more considerate of the other, because in truth, we have not walked in their shoes, and do not know all of their troubles, which signifies that it is better to find common ground and to build one another up, then to be quick on the draw to see the other as ruining our life, and therefore to be despised, without properly understanding that the more we find to hate and to dislike, the more hateful we will become and that which we find most bothersome, will continue to bother us, until we get things right.