Is there anything else that you would like to really say or talk about? / by kevin murray

There are all sorts of conversations in this world, of which the most basic point of any good conversation is for each party to connect with the other, and thereby to impart information that is of meaning one to another.  While many conversations are relatively routine, it is important to note that just about any conversation, does have a purpose, and therefore it is important for that person initiating such, if not for both people, to see that the under-riding purpose of that conversation is actually attended to.

 

Somewhat surprisingly, people can have conversations that last a considerable amount of time, but within that conversation, never actually does it get around to the real issue at hand.  The reason that this is so, depends upon the personalities and circumstances of that conversation, but a lot of times this has a lot to do with the comfort level of one person to another, of which people, even people that know each other very well, are afraid of bringing up the real agenda or what is really on their mind, because they essentially fear the judgment of the other, or feel they might be exposed to looking stupid or even of being embarrassed.

 

That is why it is important in the art of conversation, to be open-minded and receptive to actually hearing and listening to the other person.  Additionally, there is the need to acknowledge the understanding that most people do not really need to be judged, more than they feel that they are already judged by others to begin with, but rather need and desire to have more support, empathy, and compassion from the other.  That is to say, those having characteristics that are non-judgmental or are not prone to little putdowns and other negative responses, are going to be, more times than not, a better person to communicate with, because most people are more comfortable with those that are more nurturing than those that are unnecessarily critical.

 

So too, people that have something to confess or wish to get something of importance off of their chest, are going to be more inclined to speak with someone that they trust and that have won their confidence in the fair belief that such a conversation will not be divulged to anyone else.  After all, those things that make us feel especially vulnerable are difficult to discuss with others, unless we are safely assured that such a conversation will remain confidential and discreet.

 

So then, there are those times, even between very close friends or family members, when a conversation is happening, in which, one party to the other, must ask of the other, as to whether there is anything else that they might like to say or talk about; and when asking that question, they must also give the responder an appropriate amount of time to actually think about such, because a significant amount of people, that have something really on their mind, debate internally, as to whether or not, it is really the time to bring that real subject matter up.  Those that ask that question, though, at the appropriate time, may well find, that the real conversation does thus start, and from there, the opportunity to be of real assistance thereby occurs.